Why So Stubborn?


Today’s blog will be personal. Let us talk about stubbornness.

Allow me to tell you about a stubborn decision I made, and how I am still paying for it now. I’d never been surfing before, but really wanted to test it (although I knew it was not the best action for someone with a history of lower back problems ).

So I went out and surfed during a holiday season. I got up on the board with no issue, but I kept jumping from it to the shallow water. By my final day of this trip, I was getting very sore… but still chose to browse one more time. Ever since then, my back hasn’t felt the same.

Now I have tried practically everything to fix it. I have done acupuncture. I have gone to chiropractors. I have gone to massage therapists. I have been to yoga. I have done everything extending and exercise related. I have done it all… except for have an MRI.

It is funny, but during this time I’ve tried to cure myself I have never previously sat around and just rested for a couple of days like I did during the Memorial Day weekend. I really don’t like to do this since I get too into my own head.

While I sit, I feel helpless. I’m miserable. It borders on melancholy for me.

I have been sitting around my home the past several days doing nothing all day long. A number of you frequently just sit around and watch tv all day long. I don’t have any clue how you live that life.

To me, sitting and watching tv all day long is only an emotional torture. I am a doer.

I have been an athlete my whole life. I workout daily. If I don’t workout for a couple of days, I feel terrible and I must do something active to feel better.

Let us talk about psychological torture, however, because for me there is nothing worse than being made to rest. I am really stubborn. My girlfriend has told me lots of times for an MRI, but I simply would not do it.

Finally, last week, I decided to make an appointment. I am going today to receive it.

I can’t escape from my head when it comes down to needing to rest. It actually comes from the way I was brought up as a kid.

My Mother has a bad back. My Mother has struggled through it her entire life. My Mom also got sad occasionally.

My Father died of MS. He got into his head so badly that he really caused himself to receive it. He did not need it so badly that he ended up getting it. Strange story. I will share that story another day.

So I have done nothing but practice psychological strength because I was a little kid. My entire life I have had to practice mental strength.

When I was in school, I separated my shoulder. At the moment, I played a competitive intramural league and I was also weightlifting. Two days later separating my shoulder, I had been playing soccer again with my friends. I {} you struggle through pain, because nothing is worse than the emotional anguish.

So as I layed around all Memorial Day weekend stiff as could be (and annoyed as could be), I understood what my lesson from this should be: When I had listened to my girlfriend weeks ago, I’d have gotten an MRI and figured out what the problem is and what is really wrong with me. Had I done that, I’d have gotten the perfect treatment rather than performing 80 percent the wrong things.

I’ve never sat around for a week to rest and just let my body heal. I don’t understand how to let my body heal. When my spine locks up or contracts, I will fight my way through it so that I can begin walking again.

Time seems to move so slowly when you are resting. It’s ridiculous. This weekend has been torture.

She has got a little holiday and a small business trip. Good for her.

I would not want to be around me when I’m like this — stubborn, cantankerous and in my own head.

There is something about me that’s so stubborn, telling myself that I could look after myself and can make this go away on my own, that {} I really needed her I’d never say a word. When I am really hurting, I have a tendency to push people off.

Admitting that truth, about that or anything else, is a significant part of changing. I see the identical issue at a lot of you when I read your articles.

A good deal of you are still going through the exact troubles with the opposite sex over and over again. When are you going to reach out to assistance? When are you going to stop being so stubborn?

This post was formerly published on Davidwygant.com and is republished here with permission from the author.

◊♦◊

Have you read the first anthology which was the catalyst for Your Great Men Project? Purchase here: The Great Men Project: Real Stories from the Front Lines of Modern Manhood

◊♦◊

If you think in the work we’re doing here at The Great Men Project and wish to join our calls on a regular basis, please join us as a Premium Member, now.

All Premium Members get to See The Great Men Project with NO ADS.

Need more info? A whole list of advantages is here.

Download my eBook The Secrets to Attract Women FREE now by clicking here

Relationship Manipulation


Driving in Los Angeles, as most of you know, is such a joy. It looks like when you are running a couple of minutes late that people want to make you even after. Now, I am not Speedy Gonzales, but c am on… at least drive the speed limit!

Los Angeles isn’t laid back anymore. Too many folks live here. It’s simply not laid back anymore.

When you are late, however, you appear to get completely everybody on the street. So as I am writing this blog while I am driving through traffic (because that is one of those abilities I have mastered), I have a question for all of you.

If you are driving in the left lane going 20 miles and on your rear view mirror you see 40 cars piled up behind you, do you know that the courteous thing to do is go over into the right lane and allow those 40 cars get for their appointments? If you are on the telephone leaning your head to the car window as you are driving, do you understand that the vehicle isn’t your living room?

The rear view mirror was invented so you could see all the mad people behind you. The blinker was invented so people know you are going to turn and can slow down or change lanes. The horn was devised to wake up the idiot in front of you who’s writing a blog and won’t go at a green light.

And of course, in California the lights are not timed so you’ve got the joy of sitting at lights all of the time. Oh, and if you are going to give someone a dirty look then at least be man (or woman) enough to remove your sunglasses so that I can see your eyes when you give it.

Are not you happy you’re with my on my trip to the haircut? Let us move on also today’s lovely subject of manipulation.

There’s absolutely not any way to control your way to a relationship. Almost anytime somebody comes to see me for information, they’ll say something like”I wish to get information from the master” and hope to find some super-complicated, almost magical technique for how to do things. What I give them is something simple and simple.

You have been vibing with somebody and having good chemistry with them. You need to keep that going. Women and men always believe, however, that there is some unique Houdini-like trick they need to learn how to do to make that happen.

They’ll ask me,”How can I get her to like me? What if I say at the moment?” They ask these questions although at the moment they’re having amazing chemistry, and getting along perfectly with, somebody.

They do this because their previous has conditioned them to do it.

So they begin to consider how they don’t wish to generate some of these past mistakes with this individual, and they think that there should be some Houdini-like magic trick that they can do to make things with this individual perfect. In fact, however, the only magic trick I can give anyone is to stay 100% present.

They simply stay present in the current moment.

They are not future thinking, and they are not past thinking. They are only embracing and enjoying the moment, and if they’re finished linking in that instant they take that warm atmosphere and they go create another instant.

Considering the telephone call or text which may or may not come the following day. Thinking about telephone calls or texts which didn’t come from someone in your past.

The moment you let yourself visit”pastland” or”futureland” is the moment you will begin to believe there must be some sort of magical Houdini trick to make your existing relationship work. This sort of thinking is fueled by your previous programming.

Here’s the real magic: Future tribe never triumph, and past thinkers always fail since they stumble over the very same problems over and over again. If you watched last year’s episodes of the series Lost, you’d see that traveling into the past never makes things better. Every time you return in the past, you are not in the current and you’ll never make the current work.

This post was formerly published on Davidwygant.com and is republished here with permission from the author.

◊♦◊

Have you read the first anthology which was the catalyst for Your Great Men Project?

◊♦◊

If you think in the work we’re doing here at The Great Men Project and wish to join our calls on a regular basis, please join us as a Premium Member, now.

All Premium Members get to See The Great Men Project with NO ADS.

A whole list of advantages is here.

Download my eBook The Secrets to Attract Women FREE now by clicking here