Produce Attraction Through the Conversation

I just got off the phone with a customer and I wanted to share the dialogue we had with all of you.

David: So what you are worried about isn’t the opener, right? You have opened a girl up, but you are concerned about creating that fascination during the conversation, right?

Client: Yeah, that, and having something to say immediately after opening her, particularly if she is not giving me a whole lot to go off of.

So she is not giving you a whole lot to go off of. A whole lot of girls do this. But if you’ve opened her in the proper way — according to an observation, according to which she was thinking — you are getting some form of response back from her.

So let’s say you walk into a group of girls sitting there in a table. What’s that exactly?” One of them may respond,”It is the special.” You say,”What’s the special?”

You can return to her desk 20 minutes later and say,”Oh man, I purchased that special, and it is simply not as good as you said it was!” You are able to return and follow the dialogue. You don’t need to worry about creating something new each time.

You may give her 15 to 30 great seconds to consider it, and then remember what she said and return to her about it. Return at her with what you talked about with her formerly.

Carry the conversation. Pay attention to what’s going on. That’s actually the only way to do that. Otherwise, you do not keep the conversation moving or flowing.

So really gather this information. Pretend that you are an investigator. You are like a CSI — it is a crime scene. You’re this terrific investigator, and you are trying to determine exactly what this individual is all about.

What are you learning about this individual from the very first moment?
And then once you go back to speak to them again, begin the conversation based on what you have already learned. You are only uncovering a mystery — she is a mystery.

If you listen to what she’s saying the very first time you speak to her, then you’ll have tons of things to discuss the next time you approach her.

Let’s say you are talking to a woman in a coffee shop and she says,”You know, I adore Italian coffee. It is my favorite thing ever!” So then five minutes later you can speak with her again while she is sipping her coffee and ask her,”So how did you wind up falling in love with Italian coffee? Have you ever been to Italy?”

She might respond,”Oh my god, I moved to Italy, it is my favorite!” You ask,”what is so great about Italy?” And then she’ll let you know. She’ll let you know just how much she loves Rome — the history, the culture, blah blah blah… so next time you speak to her you can say,”Man, you need to tell me more about Rome. I have never been there, but I have discovered that the Coliseum is phenomenal. What was your favorite thing?”

You are moving that conversation ahead. You are taking that conversation somewhere and turning it into something rather than the blasé chat you must start fresh each time.

It is about paying attention to the details and being a excellent investigator. The more you research, the easier it’ll be.

Client: And how can you avoid being one of these fucking men that are beating a woman with endless questions?

David: The most important difference is that you are really listening to her answers and sharing yourself with her at exactly the exact same time.

When she tells you how much she enjoys Italy, you are saying,”Oh my god, I love Italy too! I moved to Italy one summer a couple of years back and the food was amazing! She replies,”Oh, I had the best pizza in this restaurant in Positano.”

You respond,”Oh my god, I was never in Positano, but I had this terrific pizza in….” You enter storytelling mode and discuss with her your experience there.

You are getting an investigator, but you are also sharing your personal stories and bonding with her through it.

So that’s how you do it. It is a conversation. If you talk to girls as you talk to your friends, you will be OK.

All we are doing is attempting to innovate fascination with everybody we connect with. The actual reason we befriend somebody is because we associate together and we show interest in one another’s lives.

So you are actually letting your true personality come out this way.

This post was formerly published on and is republished here with permission from the author.


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–I spent a recent weekend with one of my customers and I had a terrific conversation that I wanted to share with you. David: I have seen this for so long — and each and every guy does this. They move from being anything they were when they started (possibly shy or introverted) to being way over the top.What they overlook along the way (in their journey to being way over the top) is to truly listen to another person when they’re having a conversation.You’ve got great discussions, but what I watched last night (when you approached that drunk girls — and that is all they were, only drunk, dumb women. The entire purpose of last night was NOT to strategy and merely to observe. I don’t understand, but they all turned me off! Every single one of these — their behavior, the way they walked, talked, the way they carried themselves. They had so much negative energy — I did not enjoy it at all.)However, you went up and you like declared yourself like boom! I’m here! The simple fact of the matter is that you’re far more Zen-like in your character than that! You need to really tone it down a little bit and simply observe more.You’ve proven to yourself that you can walk up to everyone — great. That is the first step that each and every guy has to do. Now, you will need to say to yourself, I will approach anyone, congratulations, I know I will do it. Congratulate yourself and give yourself a very big pat on the back — it is a big step.Now you will need to become very keen to everything that’s going on in your surroundings. The reason I didn’t really speak to anyone last night was that there was no one there that was interesting to speak to — not 1 woman. None.So now when we walk around, we are all going to work inside our own surroundings. It’s our environment that provides us the clues.Don’t be concerned about missing a girl. If you miss one, that is fine. You can not have all of them, because if you do, you enter pick up mentality and that is really not attractive.Do you recall Dragnet? It is like,”here we’re downtown in a city in the usa. Five men walking around picking up girls…”It actually looks like that! It doesn’t seem like five guys just having fun. It is all about having fun and having a fantastic time.You simply need to tone it down a little bit and go in there with what I call an action plan: what do you see?I see it quite fast — I see it like THAT. You guys might see it in a moment. You’ll miss a couple more chances but that is okay. Watch, take in the surroundings, look around and see what is happening around you. What do you see?There are several tourists out here now! This is much better than LA.. LA is an excellent place — but here it is mellower, more laid-back — you will find endless amounts of people down here now.July and August are tourist weeks. If you are going to come to Seattle, you are only likely to come in July and August. That is why this is fantastic place to do this as it’s a target-rich atmosphere.Client: There is the Danskin Triathlon tomorrow morning at 7:00 with 4,000 people!David: That is not fun at 7:00 am!Todays movie is a shocking one.Have you ever opened a girl using dead bunnies?–[embedded material ] [embedded material ]– This post was previously published on and is republished here with permission from the author.– —What is your take? Comment below or write a reply and submit to us your {} or reaction here in the red box, below, which links to our admissions portal site. ◊♦◊Subscribe to our Writing Prompts email to receive writing inspiration in your inbox twice weekly. If you think in the work we’re doing here at The Great Men Project, please join us as a Premium Member, now. All Premium Members get to See The Great Men Project with NO ADS.A $50 annual membership provides you an all-access pass. You can be a part of each telephone, group, class, and community.A $25 yearly membership provides you access to a single class, one Social Interest group, and our online communities. A $12 annual membership provides you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community. Register New Account Need more info? A whole list of advantages is here.◊♦◊Get the best stories from The Great Men Project delivered right to your inbox. Photo credit: Shutterstock

I spent a recent weekend with one of my customers and I had a terrific conversation that I wanted to share with you.

The article Watch Human Behavior appeared on The Great Men Project.

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