Do Not Let Male Anger Destroy Your Relationship

Everyone wants a relationship that’s enthusiastic, joyful, and secure, but too many individuals live in a relationship that’s stressful and filled with conflict. There are conflicts or, even worse, deadly silences. Here I’ll share a few of the basics you will need to learn to understand male anger and keep it from penetrating your connection.

1. Understand that men are seldom angry for the reasons they believe.

OK, allow me to get down-home and private. Most people would say I am a fairly even-keeled sort of guy. I am generally happy, smile a whole lot, and get along well with everyone. With one exception–the girls I love. Anger has been an issue in all of my relationships with girls. I would get mad angry with my first wife (but I’d tell myself,”Of course I get mad. Who would not get angry with somebody who treats me like she does.”) But I would also get mad at our daughter (And I’d tell myself,”I have to get her to learn how to listen to me and do what I tell her to do. It is for her own good.)

The actual reason I was mad was concealed from my own awareness. Since my anger was not really about my wife or my daughter (Sure, people always do things that irritate us), my anger kept coming back again and I’d blow up in ways that never made sense for my daughter or my wife.

2. Recognize that 90 percent of our anger stems from yesteryear.

We think something in today’s causing our anger, but the fact is most all of it’s roots in the past. Its origins are in our previous relationships with individuals who injure us long ago. We bury the memories since they’re so painful. However, they do not go away. My wife looks at me a certain way or says something which feels hurtful. My daughter acts like a kid and gets stubborn and resistant.

3. Accept the fact that man anger will destroy everything and everyone you love if you don’t get serious about changing it.

My anger contributed to the breakup of my first marriage. I married an angry, violent woman (When anger hasn’t been healed, its not uncommon to select a spouse who has anger problems ). When we broke up, I licked my wounds, told me I’d just picked the wrong partner and fell in love again (although its hard to genuinely know love once we have a anger demon in us).

Fortunately, I started to get in the roots of my rage and got serious about curing it. Carlin and I have been together 39 decades now and a great deal of what I have heard and written about in my books is the result of what we’ve learned together.

4. Combine a men’s group so that you may be in the business of guys who care.

The majority of us grew up learning that guys were supposed to be strong and silent, we were supposed to solve our problems ourselves, that revealing our vulnerable sides was a sign of weakness, that big boys do not cry, and a good deal of different beliefs and principles that we learned from films, T.V., other men in our families. The end result is that many of us live within a Man Box and our anger is bottled up inside until it explodes on people we love.

I write concerning the Man Box in my book, 12 Rules for Great Men, which is out on November 21, 2019. My wife, Carlin, attributes the success of the 39-year union to the fact that I’ve been in a men’s group for 40 years. From the book, I tell you the advantages of joining a group, where you are able to find one, and how to join.

If you are considering getting details about the new book as soon as it’s available, drop me a note to [email protected] and place”12 Rules for Great Men” in the topic line.

5. Learn about the 5 stages of love and comprehend that point 3 is the main one.

Throughout the majority of my life, I believed there were just two phases. We fall in love with the ideal partner. We build a life together.

But, here is the thing. I learned that disillusionment is in fact a stage that each and every relationship must undergo. Its objective is to help us get real and deal with the wounds which we have been living with our lives that produce the time bombs that blow us up until we defuse them.

When I did my Stage 3 recovery, I coped with my dad wound and knew how his anger got transferred to me. I realized I was mad as hell towards my mom who I’d always believed was a saint for carrying on and taking care of me after my father was committed to a mental hospital. I coped with my anger towards a babysitter who had abused me when I was a kid and the neighbor woman who used to torment me and struck me, but who I could never stop because”Boys never hurt women. We are tough and we could take it.”

6. Heal Stage 3 and let real, lasting, love in your life.

I will be honest about Stage 3–Getting through it’s not straightforward. I needed help that I received from a excellent therapist. For some time, I wanted medications to help me with my lifelong depression. But the rewards let us go into Stage 4, Actual Lasting Love. We finally can get what we’ve longed for our lives, but did not know how to attain. I still get mad but it is a type of anger that’s based in the now, not being driven by previous wounds.

I can tell you that Carlin and I have fallen in love with one another and continue to fall in love repeatedly. I ask you to join us on the trip. Check out my novel, The Enlightened Marriage if you are interested in learning more. You can also come see me in my blog and discuss your own experiences.

Originally published on Men Alive.

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The Hidden Reason Men Get Angry in the One We Love the Most

Among the questions I hear over and over again is “Why is my husband so mean to me?”  I have also written about this in a post “Why Are Men So Angry?”   Of course, all of us get angry occasionally and women’s anger can be as hurtful as men’s. But there’s a universal cause for male anger which most people seldom recognize.

I will illustrate with a fast story in my own life.  When my first wife and I got married soon after college we spent {} a honeymoon in Monterrey. We’d purchased a small Honda 50 motorcycle to get back and forth from married-student home to the U.C. Berkeley campus and spoke a Honda dealership into transport it to Monterrey so we can ride it around town.

We took a bus to Monterrey and picked up our bicycle. We guessed it would be easy to find an inexpensive living room, but discovered, to our surprise, the Monterrey pop festival was happening that weekend and there was not an area to be rented anywhere in town. Fortunately, we discovered the last room available, but it was in Carmel, over the mountain from Monterrey.

We jumped on the bike, tied our luggage into the trunk, put my wife on behind me, but we were too back thick to get over the mountain. “Ok, here is what we’ll do,” I said, in my take-charge, masterfulvoice. I will ride the bag to our area in Carmel and return for you. But do not move. I will be right back.” My wife smiled sweetly, and away I went.

I looked right and left, but she was nowhere to be seen. Where the hell didn’t wander off to, I wondered. I got increasingly angry, but beneath the anger was a terror that something had occurred to her. Maybe she was kidnapped. It was her. I rode the 3 cubes, barely controlling my anger.

“Where the hell are you?” I cried. “I have not moved from the place where you left me,” she said, her anger start to rise. I felt relieved and ridiculous but still insisted that she’d walked off and was not in the ideal location. I eventually cooled down and we could get tickets to the festival. We heard a number of the greatest music of an era during the next 3 days and nights in 1967. Lou Rawls, Simon and Garfunkle, Country Joe and the Fish, the Birds, Jefferson Airplane, the Who, Jimmy Hendrix, the Mamas & the Papas, along with a young girl who soon became a celebrity, Janis Joplin.

Our marriage lasted ten years and we had two lovely kids, but it was undermined by my anger and my inability to comprehend or tell the truth about the root cause of my anger–my complete terror of being abandoned.

The origin of Male Panic and Grief

I’ve spent lots of my life becoming angry at women. I feel it is one of the important reasons that relationships go from good to poor. I explained some of the variables in my novel: Mr. Mean: Saving Your Relationship from The Irritable Male Syndrome.  But there is another element that took me years to understand and address. When my relationship with my spouse feels threatened, I feel abandoned and I fear. I wish to cry out in anguish, but I pay my pain by becoming mad. My anger would normally cause more space between me and my spouse, so I’d become even more panicked which could lead to despair and the feeling that I would lose, which would ultimately go into feeling hopeless and miserable.

So as to comprehend this procedure –Abandonment, fear, anguish, anger, despair, and depression–we need to comprehend that the Panic System that’s present in most mammals. In their publication, The Archaeology of Mind: Neuroevolutionary Origins of Human Emotions, Jaak Panksepp and Lucy Biven say,”A simple fact of life, with deep neural consequences and psychological health consequences, is that we become connected to–we love–people who nurture and befriend us.”

The issue is that a vast majority of us did not have a secure, secure, attuned home environment growing up. In my case, my dad left when I was five years old and my mom had to work full time. I was frequently left alone or in the care of people I did not know well. I grew up feeling afraid of being left handed, but I covered my anxieties with an attitude that said,”I could look after myself. I don’t need anybody. I am strong.”

All of us know the anguish of children that are separated, even for a brief time from their mothers, fathers, or other health professionals. “Contrary to the demanding protest of a kid that has been denied a treat, or even the vigorous distress of one who has been hurt,” state Panksepp and Biven,”the cries of missing kids have the unmistakable ring of urgency and fear.”

Adults never outgrow the need for support and love or the fear that results when we believe the danger of disconnection from a loved one. However, what happens when we’re taught that”boys do not cry” or”men will need to be powerful?” We hide our pain and it expresses itself as irritability. Anger is often the only acceptable emotion a lot people have learned to express. Trauma specialist Bessel van der Kolk, MD, author of The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, states, “If we do not speak about our trauma, we’re bound to repeat it.”

It has taken me years to admit my panic when my spouse is later than expected or once we’ve had a fight and she withdraws or even if another man shows her focus. Do not leave me, he says.  Hold me. Love me.  I must tune into my feelings of fear of abandonment, and place a lid on my rage. Initially, I felt so unmanly I felt embarrassed to reveal how panicked I was and could not talk about it. My thoughts reverberated with taunts from my youth and adolescence,”Cry baby, cry baby.” I was afraid my feelings could lead to my wife to love me and leave me. However, I’ve discovered that being actual, including being real about my fear and panic, really brought us closer together. Becoming vulnerable when we are panicked is the toughest thing we could do, but also the most crucial when we want real familiarity.

But, both my wife and I needed to conquer our old attitudes about men and be ready to accept that most of us become panicked when we are afraid our partner is not emotionally attached to us. We needed to conquer our fear of speaking about our past injury and the things that still provoke us today. I look forward to your remarks. Please share your personal experiences. Check out our community of women and men coming together to learn how to heal our wounds and turn anger to actual lasting love.

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The 5 Stages of Love and Your Mid-Life Marriage

Are you over 40? Are you worried your union might fail? Too many mid-life unions go under, just as soon as the couple could eventually be enjoying their time together. If you answered”yes,” to one of these questions, I hope you will read on.

After working with thousands of couples for at least forty years, I understand how difficult a time this is. First, mid-life itself turns out to be the toughest period of life for most people. Studies from around the world demonstrate that people are happier when they’re younger and get more happy again later in life. However, the pressures of life between 40 and 60 weigh heavily on people.

The statistics aren’t heartening. Somewhere around 50 percent of first marriages end in divorce and 60% of second marriages end poorly. Even marriages that stay together aren’t always happy and several folks deal with emotional problems because of this. Divorce rates for adults over forty have doubled in the past twenty decades.

Anybody who has gone through a uncontested divorce understands how devastating it could be. There’s the loss of this dream of happiness in this stage of life as we recall the words of the poet Robert Browning,”Grow old along with me, the best is yet to be.” There’s also the loss of financial stability for a couple dismantles all they have built through the years. Finally, there is the possibility of starting over and rebuilding a life when you’re 40, 50, or 60.

Fortunately, there’s a way to avoid the mid-life marriage meltdown so many folks fear. There’s a way to move forward to a life that’s even more passionate, strong, and effective than ever before. You may attain real, lasting, love.

As the majority of us know, necessity is the mother of innovation. Once I had gone through two hopeful unions and two painful divorces, I decided I’d stay single forever or discover the secret of real lasting love. Fortunately, I discovered the secret. Additionally, I found my true love. Carlin and I’ve been together almost 40 years. I wrote about what we learned in my novel, The Enlightened Union: The 5 Transformative Stages of Relationships and Why the Best is Still to Come. You can get your copy here and .

The trick to preventing a midlife marriage collapse is knowing the 5 Stages of Love and especially, the goal of Stage 3.

  • Phase 1: Falling In Love
  • Phase 2: Getting a Couple
  • Phase 3: Disillusionment
  • Stage 4: Making Real, Lasting Love
  • Phase 5: Using the Power of 2 to Change the World

Most everyone knows the first two phases. In Stage 1, we’re drawn to that special someone and we fall in love. We believe the next stage is the last one.

We do not understand the actual aim of Phase 1 and 2. From an evolutionary standpoint, falling in love is nature’s trick for us to pair up. Becoming a couple is nature’s way of getting us to have children so the species goes on. It was not designed to make us happy.

So, what’s the real goal of Phase 3, Disillusionment? From an evolutionary standpoint, its to pull us apart so we will go find different partners and have more kids. However, what I heard is that there is a far more glorious purpose that could lead us to Stage 4, Actual Lasting Love, and Stage 5 Finding Your Calling as A Couple so that you can change the world for the better.

The possibility of Stage 3 is to induce us to get real with ourselves and our spouse, to give up the illusions we project on to each other. Additionally, it can help us become the person we were supposed to be. It may also help us heal the past wounds in the family we grew up in (and yes, we have all been wounded and most of us have some healing to do).

I’ve found the job we do in Phase 3 might be the most important work we will ever do, both for healing our relationships and for becoming the person we were supposed to be. I believe relationships to be the grad school of life. We are in need of training, support, and courage to browse through all 5 Stages of Love.

I also discovered that we do not just go through Phase 3 one time. We often dig deeper and deeper as we return to the issues which Stage 3 brings up and we could cure more. I ask that you join me on the trip.

I have developed three programs to help you successfully navigate all 5 phases:

#1: The Self-Help Program That You can follow with my novel The Enlightened Union: The 5 Transformative Stages of Relationships and Why the Greatest is Still to Come.
#2: In-Depth, private, private, sessions for individuals and couples.
#3: Combine the Diamond-Tribe in which you are part of a special community of high-quality women and men led by me.

Many select 1, 2, and 3. Some choose additional combinations. If you would like more info about how to attain real lasting love, drop me a note to [email protected]. Place”Real Love” in the topic line and tell me what point you are in and what challenges you’re facing and I will send you all of the information.

Originally published on Men Alive

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Do You Need to Vastly Improve Your Health, Sex, and Love Life?

The majority of us believe that our genes determine everything in the amount of testosterone we’re born with to how long we’ll live. But the new science of epigenetics demonstrates that we can take back control of our lives and really change how our genes work. That’s great news for everybody, but especially for men and their families.

According to Dr. Kenneth R. Pelletier, Clinical Professor of Medicine, UCSF School of Medicine, and author of the book Change Your Genes, Change Your Life, “Biology is no longer destiny. Our DNA does not rigidly determine our health and disorder prospects, as the previous generation of geneticists believed. According to the new science of epigenetics, our genes have been formed by what we believe and what we do.”

I have been working with men and their families for fifty years now and have found that lots of men are locked into old patterns of irritability, anger, anxiety, and depression and are not able to break free. A lot of women are affected by a man’s behaviour but do not understand how to help.

In my book, 12 Rules for Great Men, coming out in November, I provide the very up-to-date information available on how to help men and the families that love them. After reading the book, Dr. Pelletier said,”Jed’s book is unique in offering an in-depth comprehension of why men are the way they are and do the things they do. According to his fifty years of experience working with men and their families, he gives us all the resources for living fully, loving deeply, and making a positive difference in our own lives.”

I’ve known about Dr. Pelletier’s revolutionary work in the area since the 1970s when his book, Mind as Healer, Mind as Slayer was first published and ushered in the business of mind/body medicine. There have been natural connections between his work and mine ever since which are reflected in our new novels.

In Chapter 5 of Change Your Genes, Change Your Life, he discusses”Mind Matters” and how we could turn our genetic vulnerabilities by reducing stress. He correctly recognizes that our early-life traumas may have a lasting effect on our adult health. “Research indicates that undue strain or abuse experienced during a child’s development affects that young person’s epigenome into adulthood, changing their patterns of stress reaction and often leaving them with lifelong physical vulnerabilities or psychological disabilities that require therapy.”

My research recognizes that guys are normally forward-looking and action-oriented and frequently don’t recognize the effect of our ancient life’s traumas and consequently, we’re more vulnerable to everything from heart-disease and alcoholism to suicide and cancer.

In Rule #9 in the book, I explained my own refusal in addressing childhood wounds. It never occurred to me that my lifelong anger and depression and afterwards my two broken marriages had anything to do with my past. All that changed in 1998 when I reached out to a colleague, Dr. Charles Whitfield, since I could not seem to cure my depression regardless of the fact I was receiving excellent therapy and was taking drugs. He explained that the missing piece in my recovery may be addressing childhood injury. I heard about Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and discovered they were quite common, such as experiencing divorce or parents who were alcoholic or depressed.

I discovered I had 4 ACEs, which is fantastic if you are playing poker. However, in the game of life four ACEs are extremely risky. The analysis found the following increased risk factors when you had 4 or more ACES compared to people who had none:

  • A two – to 4-fold increase in smoking, poor self-rated health, having over fifty sexual intercourse partners, and sexually transmitted disease.
  • The fantastic thing is that we aren’t the victims of our genes and we are not the victims of our early-life experiences. Neither do we need to settle for health care that’s impersonal and generic. In Chapter 6 of Change Your Life, Change Your Genes, Dr. Pelletier says,”Our challenge now is to jumpstart a transformation of health care for medication developed for a’standard’ individual to one that treats each person as unique.”

    There is emerging research in gender-specific medication. Marianne J. Legato M.D, Director of the Foundation for Gender-Specific Medicine states,”Everywhere we look, both genders are startlingly and suddenly different not only in their inner function but in how they experience illness.” For the first time, we could have health care designed especially for the special needs of males and females.

    I direct men, and the families that love them, through the next 12 practice, or principles, that assist men to live fully, love deeply, and make a positive difference in the world:

    • Rule #1: Combine a Men’s Group.
    • Rule #2: Break Free From the Man Box.
    • Rule #5: Recognize Your Anxiety and Stress Toward Women.
    • Rule #7: Undergo Meaningful Rites of Passage from Youth to Adulthood and out of Adulthood into Super Adulthood.
    • Rule #9: Understand and Heal Your Adverse Childhood Experiences and Male Attachment Disorders.
    • Rule #10: Heal Your Father Wound and Become the Father You’re Meant to Be.
    • Rule #11: Heal the Irritable Male Syndrome and Male-Type Depression.
    • Rule #12: Find Your Mission in Life and Do Your Part to Save Humanity.

    In the words of Bob Dylan, truly, the times they are a changing. We now have opportunities never before available. To find more information, you can contact Dr. Pelletier in https://drpelletier.com/ and you may email me. We look forward to linking with you.


    What is your take? Comment below or write a reply and submit to us your {} or reaction here in the red box, below, which links to our admissions portal site.

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    The One Fact About Men That Drives Men’s Anger and Fear of Girls

    This guide is the sixth in my Great Men Manifesto collection. Here is the first one, here is part two, part. , part four. and part five.

    1. Know that throughout human history 80 percent of women had children, but only 40 percent of men did.

    In our contemporary world where it appears that everybody is having sex, we forget that through most of human history some guys were having a good deal of sex and some guys were not getting any. By way of instance, Genghis Khan, the fearsome Mongol warrior of the 13th century could have done more than rule the biggest empire on earth.

    According to recent studies, he inhabited it as well. An international group of geneticists studying Y-chromosome statistics have found that almost 8% of the men living in the area of the former Mongol empire carry Y-chromosomes which were likely passed by Khan and his descendants. [1]

    Imagine for a moment being an ordinary person living during this time. You might have been murdered by Genghis Khan’s army or you could have been afraid to have sex with any pretty girl because Genghis Khan and his top lieutenants took them for themselves and you risked death even looking at a girl. In case you were a woman at the moment, do you choose to get married to a bad Mongol herdsman or be a part of Genghis Khan’s harem and be wed to the alpha male?

    How some men dominate and have more sex and many others have less is present in several specifies of mammals, including humans. Dr. Roy F. Baumeister is among the world’s leading social scientists. He’s written over 400 scientific papers and 21 novels. In his book, Is There Anything Good About Guys? How Cultures Flourish By Exploiting Men, he states,”Of all the folks who reached adulthood, maybe 80 percent of the girls but only 40 percent of the men replicated.” He goes on to say,”That is a stunning difference. Of all people ever born, most girls became mothers, but most guys didn’t become fathers. You wouldn’t realize it by walking through an American suburb now with its clean couples.” Baumeister says,”I consider it the single most underappreciated fact about guys.”

    A good deal of men’s emotions, anxieties, and sexual behaviour can be understood when we realize that all men are frightened of becoming part of the 40 percent that are left from the genetic lottery. Even alpha men who are having tons of sex are concerned that they’ll be displaced and become sexual losers.

    2. Become conscious that men put women on pedestals and pull them down.

    Most guys will realize that in the hidden recesses of our psyches and frequently in our busy adult minds, we appear to girls and watch them as superior to men and we look down on them. We’re conflicted by love and longing and by anger and fear. The #MeToo motion has come forward and encouraged girls to tell the facts about sexual violence. [3] Men should listen closely to what girls are saying with open hearts and minds.

    In The Small #MeToo Book for Men, Mark Greene addresses male fear and resistance. “As women take up the banner of #MeToo from the millions, many men are feeling conflicted, upset, upset, and even disheartened. How is it that guys are contested by a movement that says,’Do not rapesexually harass or abuse other human beings’? These are ideas we can all get behind, right? But it is not playing out that way.” Mark’s book helps us to understand the motion and our responses to it. [4]

    The words of psychologist and author Sam Keen resonate deeply with me and many guys in understanding our conflicted feelings towards girls. In his bestselling book, Fire in the Belly: On Being a Man he states,”It had been slow in dawning on me that WOMAN had an overwhelming influence in my life and about the lives of all of the guys I knew,” Keen says. “I am not talking about girls, the true flesh-and-blood creatures, but about WOMEN, those epic shadowy female characters who occupy our imaginations, inform our emotions, and give shape to a number of our actions.”

    He goes on to discuss his own experiences with girls. “But when the text of my life was’successful individual man,’ that the subtext was’engulfed by WOMAN.’ All the while I was progressing in my occupation, I had been engaged in an endless struggle to get the’right’ lady, to make my connection’work,’ to produce a fantastic marriage. I agonized over gender –was I good enough? Can she’come’? Why was not I always potent? What should I do about my desires for other women? I worked at communicating, sex, and everything else before I became self-obsessed. Divorce eventually broke the symbiotic mother-son, father-daughter, pattern of my first marriage.”

    We’ll always have a fear of being”engulfed by WOMAN,” till we recognize and accept the fundamental realities of being man, for instance, very first reality of coming to the world from the body of a female. A wife girl, Anais Nin, stated,”If someone continues to see just giants, it means he’s still taking a look at the world through the eyes of a child. I’ve a feeling that guy’s fear of woman comes from having seen her as the mother, founder of guys.” [6]

    3. Embrace the truth that men learn to be men in men’s groups.

    It seems appropriate that I finish this manifesto with men’s groups. It’s the first rule in my book, 12 Rules for Great Men, where I discuss what I have discovered to help men become the best they can be in life.

    Although being man is built to our billion-year evolutionary history, we know to be men in men’s groups. The first male connection we’re supposed to have is with our father and his group of guys. In indigenous cultures around the world, you will find birth rituals in which the guys in the tribe encourage the dad and welcome the new-born kid into the tribe.

    I have been in a men’s group that’s been meeting now for twenty five years. I still remember the group meeting when Tony brought his newborn son, Noah, to the group. All of us held him and welcomed him to the group of guys. The poet, Robert Bly, said,”A young man has to be in the presence of older men so as to hear the noise which male cells sing.”

    Consider what it means that we all have a male choir in us that’s 10 trillion powerful. Imagine what it means to be a young boy growing up listening to this symphony, awakening his own voice as he participates with the noise which male cells sing.

    I recall during the men’s group having my son, Jemal, and daughter Angela, come with me into the group which met at Tom’s home. He had a bunk bed in his little home and my son and daughter were lulled to sleep hearing the guys talk about things that matter in our own lives. They heard that the joy and despair in our voices, the laughter and the tears.

    They talk about their time with the men’s group.

    Like many, I grew up in a home with no father. I wrote about the effect of his absence had in my life and what it meant to me to reconnect with him before he died. At the Start of the memoir, My Distant Dad: Healing the Family Father Wound, I provided the following quotations that captured the impact of a father’s loss on our own lives: [7]

    • “A father might be physically present, but absent in spirit. His absence might be literal through divorce, death or disorder, but more frequently it’s a symbolic lack through silence and the inability to transmit what he {} not have acquired.” James Hollis.
    • “Children have a hole in their soul in the form of their dad. And when a father is unwilling or not able to fill that job, it can leave a wound that’s not easily healed.” Roland Warren.
    • “You will start to forgive the world when you forgive your father.”

    It has taken me 70 years to completely heal my dad wound. They also continue to teach me the way to live fully, love deeply, and make a difference in the world. It is not an accident that the first rule for great men in my book is to join a men’s group.

    I look forward to your comments and queries. I hope you will read the complete Good Men Manifesto. If you would like a copy of the entire thing, drop me a note to [email protected]. Place”Good Men Manifesto” in the topic line. If you would like more information about the new publication, 12 Rules for Great Men, let me know and I will send you the latest information.

    [1] National Geographic,”Genghis Kahn a Prolific Lover, DNA suggests”  https://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2003/02/mongolia-genghis-khan-dna/

    [2] Roy Baumeister.  Is There Anything Good About Guys: How Cultures Flourish by Exploiting Men.  http://www.roybaumeister.com/.

    [3] Me Too. You’re not alone. https://metoomvmt.org/.

    The Small #MeToo Book for Men. 

    Fire in the Belly: On Being a Man. 

    [6] Anais Nin.  Diary, 1931-1934. 

    [7] Jed Diamond.  My Distant Dad: Healing the Family Father Wound.  Lasting Impact Press, 2018.

    Originally published on Men Alive

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