4 Reasons You Will Need To Be Open With Your Ex


It happened. You’ve discovered that connection you always hoped you would find. You’ve found a person with whom you share not only an extreme chemistry, but also a really deep heart and soul link. You have created an awesome relationship place with this individual. You’re genuinely and totally pleased.

Just when you think nothing can interrupt that amazing connection place, it occurs. Your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend (we will just collectively refer to them as the”ex”) starts calling you. They begin calling you, sending you text messages and leaving you voicemail messages.

It’s remarkable. Ex’s always appear to find their way back into your own life to ditch all their problems on you in the very moment when you are most happy with somebody else. It is like they have a unique radar that alerts them that it’s the best time to attempt and get you back in the very moment you’re in this most happy location.

How do you react to the crusade to win you back? Lots of folks, from the best of intentions and from a residual sense of caring for their ex, won’t be totally honest in the way they respond. Not wanting to hurt their ex, lots of people will either not give their ex a definitive”no” to their petition or will reevaluate the depth of the feelings and dedication to their current significant other.

This isn’t the best way to answer an ex. Although not meant as such, this sort of”soft pedal” reaction to an ex really is detrimental to all parties involved and to your existing relationship.

1. They believe with absolute certainty that what they believe is the ideal thing for the two of you. When you respond to an ex in this circumstance, then, you need to maintain any measure of ambiguity from your response. It’s very important that you’re clear.

If you don’t respond to an ex’s plea with a very authoritative”no,” your ex will continue to think there’s still some opportunity to convince you to say yes. You will need to be completely honest with your ex and inform them that there’s not any possibility that the two of you may reconcile. You will need to be totally open about the fact that you aren’t only with somebody else, but that you’re with someone for whom you have very deep and intense feelings.

2. You’re not Sparing Your Ex’s Feelings: As I suggested above, you want to be completely upfront and honest with your ex about what at the first indication {} seeking to attempt and reconcile with you. When you fail to be completely open and honest with your ex, you’re not protecting them from hurt. You’re instead causing them more harm as you’re not making it clear to your ex that there’ll be no second chance together.

You want to realize that if an ex decides they should reconcile with you the moment they discovery you’re at your happiest place with somebody else, your ex is doing so because in fact they’re unhappy. Deep down they still have feelings for you, but these feelings are about their own issues rather than about yours. So you will need to clearly dispel any notions on your ex’s head their perceived feelings are all about you, so they can see they need to handle their own issues that are the actual cause of the unhappiness. To fail to do this can only ultimately cause your ex more harm down the line.

3. You’re Hurting Yourself: it’s also important that you fully let your past with your ex go in order for one to proceed and have the love that you truly deserve. When you let an ex who has invaded your area to linger there, you’re causing yourself a good deal of unnecessary harm and preventing yourself from progressing on your emotional path.

They are an ex because you learned the lesson that they didn’t meet you in ways you had to be satisfied. They’re an ex since your heart wasn’t touched by them in ways that your heart required to be touched. Your ex is an ex because they were not able to enter your soul and get deep in your heart like you needed. You’re with someone currently who does meet all these needs for you, so you will need to {} let your past go so that you can concentrate on the individual with whom you’re developing a true and profound connection.

4. You’re Causing Damage To Your Current Relationship: You want to also bear in mind that every time an ex invades your space, it hurts the sacred space you’re forming with the individual with whom you’re currently in a relationship. The only result for you when an ex invades the sacred space you have put up with a new person, is that anxiety is going to be attracted to your life and your current relationship for no reason whatsoever.

You’ve met someone with whom you’ve been developing and experiencing an actual soul connection. Allowing your ex to continue to attract tension and pain to you and to your relationship dynamic will inevitably put a strain on the bond you are building together with your significant other. Your current significant other will feel disconnected from you by your participation in managing your ex, but also in their frustration in being utterly not able to assist you. There’s absolutely no reason to permit an ex who won’t be a part of your life to impact the wonderful connection you’ve been creating.

So the next time an ex comes into your life when you’re happily involved with somebody else, you will need to be wise in how you respond. You will need to be {} with your ex about your feelings about them and about your present relationship as you’re with the person you’re currently visiting. The reason you with the person you’re currently seeing is because you are feeling free to be yourself in the purest form. It’s in everybody’s best interest that you do so. So even though it isn’t always simple, being completely open and honest with an ex is the kindest thing you can do to help your ex, for your existing relationship and on your own.

This post was formerly published on Davidwygant.com and is republished here with permission from the author.

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