10 Signs You Are Emotionally Wounded That No One Notices

You cry easily over little things.

Whenever you have psychological wounds, it is for you to be in tears because you always feel the pain within yourself. You may cry over books or movies and you become emotional when you see something which touches your heart. When you end up crying too much, listen to your internal well-being as it may be a sign that you are hurting inside.

2. You eliminate interest towards the things you used to enjoy.

Emotional wounds will make it tough to concentrate and focus on the things you used to do. You’ll be demotivated as your negative emotions are probably more in charge than you understand. The more you do nothing, the more you’ll feel the pain of your emotional wounds.

3.

Having psychological wounds will make you triggered emotionally by people’s behaviours around you. The emotional wounds that you have had will force you to stay away from interactions with others and it results in social withdrawal. Even though having an excellent time with yourself is important, bear in mind that being open with other people can also help you reduce the pain of your emotional wounds.

4. You feel unworthy and impossible .

Having emotional wounds will almost certainly make you look back on yourself and feel unworthy. You may blame yourself and feel dumb for being hurt so much. You’ll also feel hopeless and broken beyond repair. When you feel like you’re at the lowest point of your life, try to reach those folks that are really close to you. Let yourself be cared for and loved, because social support could boost your self-esteem and make you feel better with your own circumstances.

5. You keep replaying the terrible memories in mind.

When you can not overlook a painful experience on your past and it keeps replaying in mind, there is a risk that it has come to be one of your emotional wounds. Your inability to forget a painful experience is in fact a sign that you ought to acknowledge that adventure and accept the harm. Try to identify and search for the reasons why it made you hurt so much and accept being hurt because of the experience is wholly okay and normal.

6. You feel too much until you are numb.

The majority of the time, your emotional wounds are so debilitating it makes you feel instead. You may go through the day almost on autopilot that makes you care less about your environment. You do not feel sad or happy; you just exist, but you do not feel alive. Your numbness is in fact your coping mechanism to endure from your emotional wounds. Attempt to regulate your emotions because it might also be a coping mechanism for lowering your emotional distress.

7.

You overthink since you don’t want to get hurt again. Therefore, you may feel that it is important that you think and control everything about you and instead of feeling better, your overthinking habit will make your psychological wounds even worse.

8. You get a chaotic sleep program.

Due to your overthinking habit towards your emotional wounds, it is going to not be easy for you to fall asleep at night. Your mind will be filled with ideas and the night is normally the time when you’ll feel so desperate, lonely, and depressed. Your sleep schedule will change as it is difficult for you to sleep at night and you’re going to overcompensate through the day.

9. You feel stuck and helpless.

Emotional wounds may also make you feel so lost and confused. You may feel like you have nowhere to go and no one can truly heal your wounds. You’ll have so many negative self-talks inside of you and your head is usually tangled all of the time. Try to restrain your confusion and untangle your ideas by writing in a diary and remember to take it one day at a time.

10. You realize that you will need to be healed.

Even though it’s difficult for you to describe it to others, you just feel as though you’re broken inside and you understand precisely what you will need to be healed. You will search for many distractions to get over your emotional wounds and as time goes by, you may understand that they will not be cured within one night. Having psychological wounds is completely okay as long as you admit and admit it. Look for some cathartic actions to heal your wounds like writing, playing music, meditating, and doing sports.

In the long run, no matter how painful your wounds are, you will heal and get over it sooner or later. You’re doing okay.

A version of the post was formerly published on TheMindsJournal and is republished here with permission from the author.

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Having psychological wounds is completely okay as long as you admit and admit it.

The article 10 Signs You Are Emotionally Wounded No One Notices appeared first on The Great Men Project.

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Dividing Against Yourself Sucks

Today, a story about the best anguish — forgetting who we are.

The Client

Tim comes into my office. He’s torn up inside. He’s been married for several years. But… something’s not perfect.

He says that his wife is a sweet man, great to him, and a terrific mother to his children. And he says,”I’m miserable. And I have not the slightest clue as to why.

We talk for a little. Very quickly, it’s apparent that we are getting nowhere. He is completely stuck in his mind, swirling in his guilt with what a terrible guy he is, for being unhappy with such a fantastic family.

I wonder, should I get out the boxing gloves and pads? Change things up with this man?  Perhaps he can beat the shit out of the demon he feels inside of himself.

Rather, I have him get up and stretch his body, move around. Anything to escape his head. I have him perform several minutes of jumping jacks to change his energy.  Sometimes the mind is a tyrant that only circles itself.

After the motion, we stay standing. I see he’s more relaxed, even milder energetically. “A little workout during a training session,” he says. “Bonus.” He laughs.

I ask him to remain standing, feel his breath, through his or her body.  I direct him to take complete body breaths, from head to toe and then back down.

The Change

We sit down again and suddenly he is more alive. He’s prepared to step in with more bandwidth to research his unhappiness and his union, without so much painful self-judgment. He is opening to himself.  He is no more dividing against himself.

Maybe he states,”I want to explore other associations, other freedoms in my own life, take space and time away from my loved ones.” At the notion of it, his face glows.

I make no conclusions. At least, his energy is shifting. He has more access to parts of himself that he was formerly shutting down.

Needless to say, I don’t encourage him to go have an affair. I have often said, if you can not make one woman happy, how are you going to make numerous women contented?

I’m amazed at his change and not, since I see it often how a person gets much more access to themselves, once they eliminate their moralistic and judgmental perceptions of these. Neutralize the brutal inner critic.

Tim is no longer thinking about what a terrible guy he is for not enjoying his loved ones. He’s actually beginning to think what a fantastic guy he is for loving himself. And while an affair or big trip away probably will not be the avenue to supreme happiness, it is an avenue to get parts of himself against which he is divided.

The Debrief

Yes, all of us have crazy ideas, not all of which we will need to act on. But how can we get the energy of these thoughts and incorporate them into our own lives, rather than judging and dividing from ourselves?

I have heard it said often and I lived it for a long time — that the best suffering is dividing from one’s self.  It happens every day and if it does, we neglect the requirements of our soul.

It can occur in an office, sitting all day, feeling agitated, not understanding why, in front of a computer all day. It can occur in a relationship, feeling grumpy over nothing.

And we benefit greatly if we find a way back to ourselves in the hardest moments.  And it may be as straightforward as yeah, this sucks, I feel separated from myself, and I am OK.

Tim leaves our session, not booking a plane ticket to Honolulu or Guatemala, but conscious that he wants to give himself more time and energy and space. He can not be so hard on himself and then project his distress onto his union.

“It is me, not her. I’m the person who’s messed up,” he says. Ironically, he is glowing. And not ironic because he is back in his power to do something about it.  He’s no more dividing against himself, beating himself up for his own distress.

And for this, he’s a better man for everybody around him — his spouse, his family, and his friends.

Do you know a fighting man who needs help? There are many people out there. Are you that guy, going it alone? Get help today.

Previously Released on stuartmotola.com

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Internal monologue goes something like this:”Holy shit! What did I just say?! I did it again… My loved one triggered something within me and I lost my temper.”   Noooo dear lover — You did not LOSE it. You could not lose that f****r in a Where’s Waldo animation in the event that you tried.You tomahawked it in your loved one’s mind — HARD. You blew up like a bomb (again) and left shrieking shrapnel throughout the goddamn living area.  Bits of rectal blood, guts and gore stuck anywhere. You can not even see your loved one through all of the dripping, gnarly words. It was an articulated assault of viciousness. Extra strength Pine-Sol will not wash their pitted soul readily.Self-recrimination sets in:”I am such a loser. I am an unlovable wart on the ass of an ass. They’re for SURE gonna abandon me today… I just know it. I’d leave me if I could. Why can’t I ever learn?  I hate myself. I am the world’s worst spouse… no, the worst partner in the UNIVERSE! Yeah… I am a entire pile of doo-doo. I’m the sort of caca a coprophagic canine would not even consume on its wretchedly, ravenous moment.” Well dear lover, as soon as you’ve wallowed adequately enough to be covered head to toe in plenty of shame you have to work on it. You lean into the flywheel and begin that heavy shit moving.  (Hard work and the patience of a demi-god is necessary.) You receive therapized, examined, and read each self-help book as quickly as Amazon (with Prime free delivery of course) can get them into a searchable mailbox. You attempt woo-woo energy work, request advice from your hairstylist, gossip and shout with your BFF and pick up some interesting tools along the way your parents forgot to teach you.  (“Thanks mom and dad — way to go… I will send you the invoice in my $150/hr. You eventually track that shitty response to its source, back that small f****r to a corner pointing at it with a long, drawn-out “Youuuuuu…. !” Then stab your finger into its torso as you tell it to”GO AWAY! F**k off and die why not?! Why the hell can not I get over this shit once and for all?!!! GodDAMN IT! I am TIRED.” Alllll-riiiight dear lover… get back to work!  Whining is for toddlers and you wish to be the arbiter of your own fate dontcha? Lean back in the flywheel and twist that good, emotional disc until your back is aching, your tears have run dry and your palms and pits are moist with perspiration. Trust me lover, it is well worth the effort.You may never feel so free as when that wheel starts to spin by itself and you finally have REAL control over your lifetime.  You are gonna love it! Life will no longer happen TO you… you get to make whatever reality you desire. It F***’IN ROCKS!!*Shift to the present — your new reality* Guess what? That activate shit never goes off.  Enjoy never gets neat enough to place on a shelf, you do not suddenly turn into the connection guru dispensing penny advice to all and sundry AND your previous NEVER stops cooperating with your present. I thought it was gonna be simple after I leaned to that flywheel! Sometimes you’re the pigeon and sometimes you’re the statue. Regardless of what we do, when we’re triggered, our mind is so damn fast it’ll take us into the past at a split microsecond.  (Who knew we were such amazing time travellers!?) All we can do is select another response.We start by learning how to identify the start of a rapid heartbeat, nausea in our gut, or the choking feeling in our throat that suggests a cause is on its way up from the depths of our mind. Bodies never lie, dear lover… NEVER. This is our opportunity to choose an alternate reaction. It is a message from our future selves if we hear.Learn how to recognize those body signs and follow this up with two synchronized, learned activities. (Notice I said activity — not REaction.)To begin with, and honestly, most significant — ZIP IT.  Just shut the F**K upward for an instant .  Whatever verbal vitriol you have bubbling behind your uvula can wait till you have had an opportunity to analyze it and then, if you have to, consciously CHOOSE whether or not to unleash the unholy harangue from hell upon your loved one.Trust me fan, a few seconds will not make a little difference in the event you finally continue on your initial anger track.  It is going to do equal harm whether you choose to prematurely upchuck your previous onto your current or if you decide to wait and, after a cursory examination, opt for ultimate relational annihilation vis a vis your flapping jaws. The big difference is you’re taking responsibility with the next option.Let us assume for the moment that you (sensibly ) opt to have a breather and zip it. Second is to acknowledge your cause and then ask yourself this {} question as you’re looking into the eyes of the one you love:”Who would I wish to BE at the moment?”If your response is,”A crying, salivating orc in the pits of Mordor.” Or”An arrogant, self-important know-it-all who’s always perfect.” then by all means, let ‘er rip and consequences be damned — again.However, if you’re able to examine your loved one and decide that you need to BE somebody who calmly, compassionately, maturely expresses how you feel about the cause you just experienced in their unwitting hands, then you may opt to BE just that.It is a choice, people.   No, it will not be simple. Nothing worth having ever is. If you do your inner work, monitor your routines, stories, sorrows and pains back to their roots and wrap that child in a huge, heartfelt hug, participate in primal scream therapy or anything else it is that floats your metaphysical boat then you’ll have the beginnings of a custom of owning your shit and a opportunity to speak your truth like a rockstar.Notice I said”clinic”.  Nobody is born knowing this stuff and practice is the path to sustainable behaviour. More than anything precious lover, be kind to yourself as you begin down the street towards personal accountability.  Nobody ever develops without failure. Consider it, if you are in a heavenly state, why on earth would you change anything?! It’s our screw-ups that create the chance for change.So as you practice grabbing your body’s signs and your reactions, ensure that you allow yourself to chuckle at your own mistakes.After all, laughter IS the best medicine dear lover!–Previously Released on gracegetzen.comShutterstock

No, it will not be simple. Nothing worth having ever is.

The article Dear Lover, I Lost My Temper — Again appeared on The Great Men Project.

Download my eBook The Secrets to Attract Women FREE now by clicking here

15 Things Introverts Crave In Romantic Relationships

Are you currently dating an introvert and not quite sure about what an Introvert wants from a relationship?

Let’s talk about details. Introverts are terrific lovers.

They aren’t as tough as you believe them to be. These dreamy-eyed lost souls will keep you wondering’what is going on in that gorgeous mind.’

They’ll take you to get a’mystery ride’ but leave you madly in love as soon as you click well together.

Here are 15 things An Introvert wants from a relationship:

(Promise, we do not need much from you, except for these few things)

1.

on a lazy Sunday afternoon, while watching our favorite show.

2. We crave your approval,

Just the way we’re — mad, daydreaming, overthinking, cluttered individuals.

3. We kiss your protective arms

Like we’re babies, who must be loved and pampered.

4. We crave to plant the seed of our never-ending, ceaseless, love,

That will one day grow in leaps and bounds.

5. We crave to look deep in your eyes

Until every ounce of our love is sipping through and drowning you inside.

6. We crave your patience to wait

Until we say exactly what we want. We’re slow in processing, but when we start doing this, our mind is going hayward.

7.

To believe in our capacity to express everything once we are overwhelmed with emotions.

8.

We need time to unwind, energize ourselves, and steer clear of all kinds of social interactions and what we’re expected of.

9.

With the life-giving energy potion, and return to you with replenished power to appreciate and care for you.

10. We crave your compassion, to understand us and connect to us outside the Standard

So you can feel us deeply, more intensely and our marriage happens at a higher kingdom.

11. We crave one to be our muse, our rhythm, and inspiration;

We would like you to be the reason for our masterpiece, our love child.

12. We crave your mastery over the understanding of us.

We would like you to notice our small declarations of affection, the tiny attempts we make to make you feel special — the parties which we both rocked, laughing and drinking with our friends.

13. We crave to go for a couple of trips with you —

Where we could both enjoy quality and private time in the lap of the quiet nature embracing us and curing us.

14. We crave one to take a tour in our thoughts, in our dream land,

One of the many characters from our favorite books, that we fell in love with. Do not be jealous of them, as you’re the protagonist of the distinctive story we’re writing.

15. Last but not least, we would like you to know that we’re trying our best to love you the way you deserve to be loved.

We try our best to never let that lovely, glowing smile fade from your face.

Introverts treasure the near

relationships they’ve stretched

so much to create. — Adam S. McHugh

From SHREYASI DEBNATH

An editor and writer keeping keen interest in painting, creative writing and reading. I did my Masters in Clinical and Counselling Psychology and have been a counseling psychologist in a primary school for the last 1 year. I enjoy doing absolutely anything that mends a mind and soothes a soul. Most often than not, I ponder over to produce poems. A wandering soul in search for significance.

A version of the post was formerly published on TheMindsJournal and is republished here with permission from the author.

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Hacks for Feeling Better About Relationship

Transparency, trust, vulnerability, uncomfortable and scary are merely a few of the things which make love (and lifestyle ) grand! 

If you would like a better attitude and a greater degree of satisfaction pick it! 

Talk to yourself!  Stop the negative self talk like”I am not good enough,” I am too old/ obese /  busy/ etc.”Rather make it a habit to search for the good rather than the bad in yourself, in others and in every circumstance!

Ask yourself, what’s the worst thing that could happen? By imagining negative and unlikely outcomes, you understand you will be fine and can handle a great deal more than you understand. You may even crack up yourself by imagining ridiculously funny and improbable outcomes.

Recognize and celebrate your little wins! 

When coping with unpleasant tasks, start looking for the things which are beneficial and concentrate on that.

Keep talking to yourself… my favorite questions to ask myself are “why not?” ; “is this worth it?” ; and my favorite which is the question which helped me find the love I have now is,”if you do not do so, will you regret it?”

Tell people exactly what you want. People today want to give you exactly what you want, but they’re not mind readers.

You do not know anybody else’s story.

  • Another person is not perfect, and neither are you.
  • Transparency, trust, vulnerability, uncomfortable and frightening are merely a few of the things which make love (and lifestyle ) grand! 
  • Should you slip into old patterns, grab yourself with no judgement, and make better decisions. 
  • Everyone just wants to be heard and seen. 

Do you wish to boost your clarity and self-awareness? Coaching can help you become more intentional, empathetic and caring for yourself and others.  Call Galia!

To find out more and support in your Dating journey contact [email protected]

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When Your Partner is not The Issue, Perhaps You Are

It was classic one finger pointing at my spouse, three pointing back at me.

The Problem

Man, I was pissed off. For the second time in a week, she changed plans. Then she decided she couldn’t meet me, as intended.  Damn, it was her idea in the first location.

She left me one of these voice text-memos. “Listen, I’m headed home. I want some time alone. I hope you will come by later.” I wasn’t even part of her choice.

And who feels the effect?

Speaking My Truth 

And then I thought, I want to tell her truth. This isn’t working for me. I really don’t feel like a priority for you.

She wants to know where I stand. I have been enjoying”flexible nice man” and it is not serving me. No more withholding.

Damn! Relationships are such a pain in the ass.

I begin recording a voice memo back to her.

“Hey babe, that did not work for me. For you to send me a voice memo and then go home. We had plans and besides… it does not feel right for me to now drive to you… and also…”

She said she wants some alone time. I don’t need to dump this on her today. I delete the voice memo.

I take a breath. Damn, I am jacked up.

I toss the telephone on a table. Shit, I do not know what to say to her. I pick up the telephone. I text a reply –“Got it. TTYL.”

I am proud of not escalating, making something from nothing. However, it is not nothing. Then, what is it?

I want some time. I am able to reply in one hour. Let her have her time. I want to determine what’s happening inside of me.

I tap in. It is clear to me. I’m angry.  And I know that under anger is frequently sadness.  I am sad, disappointed that I didn’t get an opportunity to see her.

I feel some more, I think, Did I tell her to call me before she made her choice? I believe it further. Shit, I did not. I advised her to come by or text me. I wasn’t very clear.

In actuality, I understand, I advised her to care for herself and allow me to know what she chose. I was being my classic, flexible nice man. A mask I have worn often previously. A pleaser, a caretaker…before my mad jerk shows up.

Wow! Instantly, my jacked-upness deflates, like hot air gushing out of a balloon. I feel relieved, humbled, and even proud for pausing and viewing things.  Old patterns die hard, but with work die nonetheless.

I was pissed off at myself for not advocating for what I wanted. And I was ready to dump it {} , in the guise of”speaking my truth.”

I laugh. What an great realization.   A large mistake to educate me, to not wear the wonderful man / mr. trendy”all great” mask. But instead, to talk for what I need — respectfully. Superior stuff. I smile.

The Debrief 

So, what’s the takeaway here?  Just how easy it is to project at our partner exactly what we’re avoiding in ourselves.  And what a superpower in order to do otherwise.

A couple of questions to ask yourself the next time you are in conflict.

  • What am I upset about?
  • Is it at myself for not behaving a particular way?
  • How would I do the interaction differently next time?

The point is that we can always do better.  Ultimately, our best powers lie in the way we appear, not in how we could alter or control our spouse.   Sure, we could create requests.

And… love yourself when you screw up.  The comparison is moping, beating yourself up, and then projecting it in your relationship.

Remember, each of us is fully responsible for the connection, not one another.

And finally, it is not conflict in relationship that is the issue, but one’s inability to take care of it skillfully.

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Previously Released on stuartmotola.com

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Stop the’He Said, She Said’ Arguments On Your Relationship

“He said/she stated” has many meanings in the present world. It plays a big, and frequently unfair, role in determining whether abuse, harassment, or assault has occurred. But it may also make unpleasant exchanges in the best of relationships.

There’s a saying that perception is reality. That is not to say that there’s not any such thing as verifiable fact. Only that without an entirely objective measure, like a sound or video recording, it’s impossible to establish. Unfortunately, lots of people, maybe even you, expend an enormous amount of energy and emotion fighting somebody else’s perception.

I can’t tell you how often 1 person relating an event to me is interrupted by their spouse with,”That is not what happened? Or, I did not say that.” The first person reiterates their recollection, the spouse denies it, and things continue to spiral out of control unless I measure in.

While this works in my office, unless the couple knows this he said/she stated is obviously an exercise in futility, they will keep getting caught up in this unresolvable loop of trying to be right; not getting to the core of the matter and continuing to feel unheard and invalidated.

The reality is, you can’t encounter an event or conversation the exact same manner as another person. More importantly, you’ll never truly convince them they did not experience it the way that they believe they did. There’s always your version and their version of what occurred. The objective reality is someplace in the middle but, for all useful purposes, that does not matter.

So how can you stop this power struggle? Reduce your end of the rope. As soon as you stop pulling against your spouse, they’ll stop pulling against you. Then, and only then, can you get a real conversation.

The first step in this procedure is determining what’s really going on. You don’t need to justify or defend it, but you do have to understand {} subjective. It’s filtered through the lens of your physical, mental and psychological state in the moment and your previous experiences, both with this individual and everyone else you have encountered in your lifetime.

What you hear is not always what they said or intended. That does not mean you did not hear it like that. It’s what you experienced. Without any more information, you may do it on what you think happened. And, therein, lies the path to ruin, or at least an argument.

However, when you get sidetracked into what was or was not stated, the tone it was or was not said in, what was meant or not intended, you lose control of the situation and, frequently, of yourself. You are convinced you are”right”. Your spouse is convinced they are. Neither will give earth so that it turns into a drop for you, a lose for them, and also a big drop for your connection.

The antidote is to STOP, FEEL, and THINK.

STOP: When you recognize the dialogue is headed in the wrong direction, STOP talking. If you understand you made a wrong turn on the street, you would not keep driving away from where you are trying to go. The identical behaviour makes no more sense in a conversation.

FEEL: Once you’re no longer headed in the wrong direction, cope with the feelings which were stirred up. What you knew your spouse to say, the tone they used, or their facial expression/body speech made a reaction. If you feel anger, there’s probably another emotion in the center that is more applicable.

THINK: This emotion is the basis for the story that you’re telling yourself about what is happening. It’s the filter that determines what you listen to and remember. It’s a reflection of what matters to you. But, it’s just one possible interpretation. Once you are able to identify a few, you have the choice of selecting a different one. This gives you a means from the He said/She said right coat.

If you’re”right”, then your spouse is automatically”incorrect”. If you’re able to have different perspectives, you both can be”right”. This stops the debate over what occurred and permits you to move in the process of finding resolution.

That’s a topic for another day.

Need help now? Click here to contact me to get a free 15-minute laser training session on your main communication issue.

A version of the post was previously published on TheHeroHusbandProject and is republished here with permission from the author.

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Have you read the first anthology which was the catalyst for Your Great Men Project?

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If you think in the work we’re doing here at The Great Men Project and wish to join our calls on a regular basis, please join us as a Premium Member, now.

All Premium Members get to See The Great Men Project with NO ADS.

A whole list of advantages is here.

You never encounter an event or conversation the exact same manner as another person.

The article Stop the ‘He Said, She Said’ Arguments on Your Relationship appeared first on The Great Men Project.

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–Three loaded words. They imply infatuation, fascination, hope, desire, despair, happiness, fear, jealousy, devotion, and a shit-ton more. We state them when we think we mean them when we expect we mean them when we know we do not mean them when we can not help but mean, when we just utilized to mean them. They’re a watershed for each affair, hopefully, when you have exhausted your capacity to express affection and gratitude for somebody by saying that you like them, love them, love them, etc. You say them once you end up prefixing every compliment with”actually,” using more superlatives than an over-caffeinated preteen, and you’re powerless to convey your feelings in any other conditions.You say them if a individual becomes the axis around which your ideas and feelings revolve, and you know you could not deny them whatever it was in your power to give them. You say them once you know you could forgive a person for so much your sanity and well-being are theirs to undergird or dismantle. You say, like someone who’s just sober enough to understand {} drunk, waving helplessly and thankfully goodbye to a sense of control and objectivity.The first time you opt not to say them, when you admit to yourself that you have not supposed them in a while, or when you would still imply them, but it has become immaterial, is often the most painful experience of your lifetime. They’re, possibly, the three riskiest words in the English language, and anyone who has lived, really lived, knows they’re as much of a precipice as strong bedrock. When you have everything to lose and you are prepared to put it down for somebody, you say, a prayer and a promise,”I love you”–What’s Next in The Great Men Project? Improve your relationships. Join our Love, Sex, Etc..  Connect the Sex, Love Etc.. We think you will enjoy our SOCIAL INTEREST GROUPS–WEEKLY PHONE CALLS to talk, gain insights, build communities– and help resolve some of the most troublesome challenges the world has now. Calls are for Members Only (though you can combine the first call for free). Join now! Join The Great Men Project Community All levels get to see The Great Men Project website AD-FREE. The $50 Platinum Level is an ALL-ACCESS PASS–combine as many groups and courses as you need for the whole year. The $25 Gold Level gives you access to some ONE Social Interest Group and ONE Class–along with other benefits listed below the form. Or…for $12, join as a Bronze Member and support our mission, and have a {} ad-free viewing experience. <! Please note: If you’re already a writer/contributor in The Great Men Project, log in here prior to enrolling. (Request a new password if desired ).◊♦◊ANNUAL PLATINUM membership ($50 annually ) includes:1. AN ALL ACCESS PASS — Combine all of our weekly forecasts, Social Interest Groups, courses, workshops, and personal Facebook groups. We have at least one group phone call or internet class each and every day of the week. 2. See the site with no advertisements when logged in! 3. MEMBER commenting badge. ***ANNUAL GOLD membership ($25 annually ) includes all of the benefits above — but only ONE Weekly Social Interest Group and ONE class. ***ANNUAL BRONZE membership ($12 per year) is great if you aren’t ready to join the complete conversation but wish to support our mission anyway. You’ll still receive a BRONZE commenting badge, and you can pop into any of our weekly Friday Calls with the Publisher when you have time (Friday calls only). This is for men and women that think –just like we do–that this conversation about men and changing characters and goodness in the 21st century is one of the most important conversations you can get now. Need more details? Click here. ♦◊♦We’ve pioneered the biggest worldwide conversation about the changing roles of men in the 21st century. Your support of our work is inspirational and valuable. What We Talk About When We Talk About Guys –Photo courtesy iStock.

They mean everything.

The post Three Small Words appeared on The Great Men Project.

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1 Question Struggling Couples Never Ask Themselves

Several houses, a ship, a wholesome family. But in his union, that wasn’t the case. He was with his wife for 17 years. He struggled to speak to her. And he took it to heart.

“How is it I am so powerful at work, I am so in my zone, at my best? But at home, I feel like a fumbling idiot?”

Sandra had a similar issue. Except she had been on the other side of this work-home spectrum. A stay at home mother, she loved her home life. She was raising two children she felt deeply connected to. And then there was her union.

“I believe I am invisible to him.”

Jason. His main flaw in his wife’s eyes, she told himwas that he had been nearer to their children than to her. While he appreciated how hard she worked, and how she encouraged their loved ones, he felt like he could nothing right with her.

“At work, she is a powerhouse. At home, she has nothing left in the tank. She gets irritated when I ask her out on a date. We have not had sex in two decades.”

A lengthy period of unfreedom must proceed a period of liberty.

Nietzsche

Wow. Is not it true?

Unfreedom. Consider It. It is a powerful word. And it describes the condition many couples find themselves.

Why is it so damn common?
How can we lose one another from the day to day?
How can we lose ourselves?

I lived it for decades.
I understand it.

My mission in life is to change it. And still, the unfreedom is a gift. A gift to the emerging period of liberty. A present for the thickness of hunger it generates for liberty. The freedom to love openly, to connect openly, to see one another openly.

There is a way to get there. It is inside of a question that I asked Mike, Sandra, and Jason. It is a question struggling couples do not ask themselves. And it offers a road map to the relational freedom, connection, and love all couples hunt. And it is simply this…

How can you withhold from your spouse?

Consider it for a moment, in your present relationship, or by a prior one. Pause for a minute and ask yourself…

How do (or did) I never show up?
What do I not speak?
Where do I accept the status quo?
Where do I never ask for what I need, and instead merely complain?

This is the start. This is the beginning. From here, you’ve got the keys to the kingdom — to cultivate an energized and satisfying relationship. Now you need to ask yourself…

Do you need to measure in further?
Or simply hold the keys
?
What is the charge not to stepping in?

Pause. Answer these questions.

At the end of the day, when it is our turn to die, we ask ourselves…

Can I give my best to those I loved?

At death, we approach our anxieties. We’ve got nothing to lose. We visit scariest place within — itself, between me and me.

Summon that courage now as you’re alive. Own that distance between you and you. In my experience, that makes all of the difference.

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

with your one wild and precious life?

Where would you subtract from your spouse?

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7 Ways You Ruin Your Chances of Getting the Love You Really Want

After reentering the dating kingdom ten decades back, she can maintain a deep firsthand knowledge of the good, the bad, and the ugly of relationship now. She based SOMETHING IN COMMON, a theory focused on empowerment, changing habits, and above all, building relations with the appropriate individuals. Through a series of one-on-one and group training and organized personal occasions, she prepares individuals for the dating scene, and attracts the dating scene direct to you in a manner that’s safe, approachable, and finally helps individuals find their own happiness. Whether you’re interested in one-on-one training, or only want to meet people, SOMETHING IN COMMON is for you.

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